My dad phoned me at 1:30 a.m. as if he were calling in a problem he couldn’t fix. “Tomorrow, you can join your brother’s fiancée’s family for dinner,” he said, “but keep your mouth shut.” I asked why. Before he could reply, Mom cut in sharply: “Her dad’s a judge. Don’t embarrass us, you always do.” I smiled. “Got it.” During the toast, the judge suddenly paused right in front of me: “Hello, I’m surprised to see you here. Who are you to them?” The room dropped into silence.