Whenever I possessed the audacity to point out this glaring mathematical discrepancy, she would accuse me of harboring a “toxic employee mindset.” Brooke operated under the ironclad delusion that she organically belonged in executive-level boardrooms., corporate human resources departments believed otherwise.

Her resume was a graveyard of fabricated titles: Wellness Consultant, Brand Strategist, Luxury Experience Curator, Synergistic Networking Specialist, Lifestyle Entrepreneur, and, for one confusing fortnight, a Creative Director.