PART 1

“Mrs. Rollins, your husband and another woman just arrived at the emergency room stuck together,” the nurse said over the line.

The call came in at 2:07 a.m. while I was lying awake in our quiet home in Denver, Colorado. My husband, Kenneth, had told me he would be spending the night closing a major real estate deal in Colorado Springs. I feigned pure shock over the phone, quickly slipped into a robe, and asked which hospital they had been taken to. The nurse at Saint Anthony Medical Center paused awkwardly before explaining that the couple had mistaken an industrial adhesives tube for a bottle of intimate lubricant, leaving doctors unable to separate them without medical intervention.