But it was the girls who truly kept me going. Olivia had Anne’s stubborn chin and her way of scrunching up her whole face when she laughed. Emma had her gentle curiosity, always staring at everything with those wide, wondering eyes. And Ava, the smallest, had her fierce determination — always the first to roll over, the first to crawl, the first to shout ‘Dada’ from her crib. Every milestone was a stab of joy and pain all twisted together. I’d cheer and clap, and then I’d have to walk into the next room and fall apart because Anne wasn’t there to see it.
When they turned one, we had a little party at the house. I made a smash cake all by myself — it was lopsided and the frosting was too thick, but the girls dug into it with their tiny fists and I laughed for the first time in months. I remember looking at their messy faces and thinking, ‘Anne, I hope you can see this. I hope you know they’re okay.’
The years slipped by like pages in a book you can’t stop reading. First steps turned into running, first words turned into endless questions. I learned how to braid hair by watching YouTube videos at two in the morning. I memorized every Disney movie song and the names of every princess and which lunchbox belonged to which girl. I sat through ballet recitals and soccer games and school plays, always alone in my folding chair, clapping until my hands hurt.
I dated once, a few years after Anne passed. A kind woman named Cheryl who taught at the elementary school. She was patient and warm and the girls liked her, but I couldn’t do it. Every time she laughed, I’d hear Anne’s laugh. Every time she touched my hand, it felt like a betrayal. I ended things after six months, and Cheryl understood. She said I wasn’t ready, and she was right. I don’t think I’ll ever be.